Do you sometimes wonder what you can do to help someone who´s grieving? I can help you with that question,…
As I do daily, I am companioning a wonderful person through the death of their beloved little furry friend. A truly dark time for this person who loved their little doggie with all of their heart – a heart that is now broken into a million pieces.
As a companion, it is such an honor to be here for this journey. A journey that will go through darkness before we can get to the light. My role is to just be here and to be guided by the grieving heart. A role that sometimes can be so hard as it´s human nature to want to “fix” what´s hurt. However, I cannot be the one to own this grief. I am not here to be “responsible for” the grief journey but to merely be “responsible to” the mourning soul.
Do you wonder how to help someone who is hurting through the loss of a pet? Here are some thoughts and suggestions for you on how to be a companion:
* Just “be” with the person who is grieving – you have been given a truly trusted position of unconditionally loving the mourning heart and just “being” there. Not necessarily talking to fill the silence – but just “being” there. Silence – by the way – PRICELESS!
* Do not fix anything – actively listen, unconditionally love, be patient, and do not try to make anything better.
* When a question is asked – it is merely to find some meaning in the event that has happened. A question does not mean that it is entitled to an answer. Revel in the mystery.
* Allow the grieving soul to search for that meaning – including the spiritual and religious aspect. Again, answers are not what the hurting heart wants.
* Lastly – the biggest piece of advice that I can share with you – HONOR THE STORY with the grieving heart. Honor the story of this beautiful little creature that has died and let your friend tell that story, again and again and again. In addition, your role will be to listen – again and again and again. When they want to tell the stories again, you need to unconditionally love your friend/family member enough to hear those stories another time. A grieving heart wants to tell the stories; it allows the deceased to live on.
Be a companion. It truly is an honored role.